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July 19, 2006

23 Flavors

Huh. The makers of Dr. Pepper now claim that their soda includes 23 distinct flavors. As the kids are fond of saying, that is "madd flavas".


Of course, the Pepper-Masters will not divulge their secret recipe. If they revealed the 23 flavors of Dr. Pepper, no one would need to purchase it. People could just buy the ingredients at Wal-Mart and brew up a batch in their bathtub (same way my college roommates used to make gin).

However, I've got good news for all of you Dr. Pepper maniacs! Your boy Joey happens to be a Soft Drink Connoisseur. After sampling Dr. P on several occasions, I believe I have isolated each of the delicate and complex flavors in this beverage. Though I expect my website will quickly be shut down by the Cadbury-Schweppes Corporation, I will now list all 23 of those flavors:

Flavor #1: Caramel.

Flavor #2: Vanilla.

Flavor #3: Plum.

Flavor #4: Sandalwood.

Flavors #5-#23: **ASS**.

Posted by Joey at July 19, 2006 12:21 AM

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I totally agree with you.
This is what I posted in a bulletin on myspace,

"Seriously what is wrong with all of us?! Okay, I don't know. Just listen. They say they have 23 flavors, right? BUT, They don't tell you what it is because they don't want people to make little WANNABES but we do anyways. How is that? If we don't know the flavors then WTFZX. You know, they could be lying about having 23 flavors and they just want us to think that there is so we're like AW THATS KEWL MAYNE. And dude, DR. PEPPER isn't even that good. OMG. I drink like 6753478956 a day and I don't even think about it. I don't think about what's in it, or why I'm drinking it. Most of the time I just get bored and go get a freakin' soda and yeah. Can anyone say CRACK?! Goddamn, that may be one of the freakin' 23 flavors. GAHH, Me and Megan are like stressing over this. Yeah, if we don't figure out the freaking 23 flavors we are seriously going on strike of drinking Dr. Pepper with 23 flavors. It used to just be Dr. Pepper but now it's Dr. Pepper w/ 23 flavors. Why did they change it?! It always tasted the same but now they decide to tell us there is 23 flavors in it? WTF. This is gay for serious. We are all freakin' addicted to this and we don't even know if there are drugs in it, I mean, maybe some new hidden wannabe drugs that people don't know are really drugs yet. Like hidden drugs that the people don't even know about yet. Okay, somebody call 1-888-DRPEPPER and find out the freakin' 23 flavors DAMN! Message us about it please. Kaythanks."

I used what you said to and yeah. :D
Your amazing.

Posted by: Cindy & Megan at August 10, 2006 03:55 PM

I hear what you're saying... but maybe you should CUT DOWN on the Dr. P. I think maybe you've had enough for one afternoon!

Posted by: joey at August 10, 2006 04:19 PM

Omg wht cant they just tel us all the FREEKIN 23 flavors. Me and my friend Tots try to figure out the flavors and we only can figure out cherry & vanilla. So what if people will go ouyt and buy the sutuff to make Dr Pepper we probably wouldn't get it right anyway we would probably screw something up thats it wouldn't taste right anyway. just tell us the 23 Flavors.. pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez.

Posted by: Allison at January 16, 2007 08:02 PM

I don't get it....if it is such a "secret" then why can we get the ingredients to coke? OK I get it 23 flavors of crap!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Lisa at January 21, 2007 09:42 PM

okay, here's the story, what it really is, is a soda fountain suicide. the just got a glass and pushed every button on the soda fountain, only, they had to do it in like china or something, because they have more flavors...than normal soda fountains. i'd have to say probably vanilla, cherry, prune, molasses, blended soy sauce, a hint of tobasco, worchestershire sauce, raspberry, cranberry...uhh...

Posted by: Joe at April 24, 2007 12:03 PM

really, guys, i finally found it. the secret's out, dr pepper, we know what's inside of you. mwa ha ha ha...the following is a list of what they didn't want you to see...

1-Rat Spit
3-Wet dog
7-Paper towel
9-Mashed maggots
12-Wood pulp
15-Beef Bologna
16-Corn husks
17-Mold spores
18-Sea water
19-Carpet cleaner
20-Laundry water
21-60 day old milk
22-Juicy juice

now ya know. are you so keen on drinking it anymore?

Posted by: Joe (again) at April 24, 2007 12:07 PM

Way to go tracking this list down Joe! The urine and laundry water I suspected, but the addition of bologna and mustard certainly surprised me.

Though it DOES explain why Dr. Pepper goes so well with a tasty Bologna + Mustard sammich.

Posted by: joey at April 25, 2007 03:37 AM

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