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February 09, 2006

Cartoon Blasphemy

I don't talk politics on this web site. I figure that if you really want to see some asshole spouting political opinions on the internet, you'd probably prefer to read the opinions of someone who actually follows politics. Or at least pretends to. That's not for me; which is why I've chosen to stick to doing what I do best: making cheap jokes at the expense of famous people I've never met.

Nevertheless, there is something going on in the world I feel I must address. You've probably heard about a series of political cartoons that have totally enraged Muslims around the world - and it takes a lot to piss off those guys. The cartoons, published in a Danish newspaper, presented a visual depiction of the prophet Mohammed. Muslims consider such depictions to be blasphemous. As a result, there have been violent protests, calls for the assassination of the cartoonists and boycotts of certain delicious breakfast pastries... specifically, bagels. Not because they hate Jews, but because the trauma of seeing their messiah insulted caused them all to suddenly become allergic to wheat gluten.

While most Americans consider all this to be a massive overreaction by the Muslim world, I totally see where they are coming from. As I've mentioned before, I am a devout worshiper of Bast, the ancient Egyptian cat-God. SHUT UP YOUR RELIGION IS STUPID TOO. Anyway... inspired by my outraged Islamic friends, I hereby call for the death of cartoonist Jim Davis, creator of Garfield.


Longtime readers know this is the second time I have called for the death of Jim Davis. The first time I was very drunk, and I don't remember what I was getting at exactly. This time, however, I am only slightly drunk... and dead serious about killing that guy. Think about it, Muslims called for the death of a cartoonist for ridiculing their spiritual leader just once - and they were right to do so. Meanwhile - in his hateful, sacrilegious Garfield cartoon - Jim Davis has ridiculed my feline deity in THOUSANDS UPON THOUSANDS OF LAME COMIC STRIPS!!! He deserves to die, along with Ikuko Shimizu - the man who created Hello Kitty.

Posted by Joey at February 9, 2006 03:35 AM

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The death of Jim Davis? Now that's something we can all get behind!

Posted by: David at February 24, 2006 08:52 PM

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